Working on just stopping in life to just chat with the Love of my life. Just felt the need to share a couple conversations with someone who may not have the words to express how they’re feeling right now, or don’t understand where they’re at, or maybe just don’t know how to come to God about it. Not sure how many I’ll share as I talk to Him, but I pray that this is also someone else’s prayer. And if it is, know that God hears you, and He loves you, and you pouring out to Him honestly is what He wants from you. Let Him draw you nearer as you cry out to Him…
Taking out some time to talk with You. I do have some questions if you don’t mind me asking. Am I in the right place, or am I doing something wrong? Am I inside Your will or on the outer edges of it? Are my motives wrong? Am I holding stuff back? If so, what is it and will I ever be able to really let it go? Will I always be in this place mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally?? Will I ever fully trust You and stop wavering? I mean really actually fall in love with You and only You, and be content in my life? This is just the place that I want to come to but it seems impossible. I just wanted to share what was on my heart with You. I just want to move from where I am to where You want me to be, but I guess the requirements…well…it seems that I put “me” in front of that too often. And “me” doesn’t want to do anything that is required of me to do. God, “me” just wants to be lazy, procrastinate, and enjoy instant pleasures instead of eternal. God, I can’t get past this stage of “me, me, me”. Help me please…help me get passed “me” to You. I hear You saying be still and that You will guide me..I trust and believe that You will do that, but God help me with my unbelief. Build up my Spirit man to be stronger than my flesh man. Open me up to Your Spirit’s direction in me, clear my mind to hear Him clearly. Open my heart to You God. I want to allow You to love me fully! Help me to allow You to uproot anything that is not You and not a part of Your purpose for my life. I just want You God! Deep down under all of this junk they call flesh, is a soul that is so thirsty for You and a Spirit that delights in You. God I want to walk by Your Spirit and not by my flesh. This is my heart at the moment. Thank You God for receiving it with wide open arms and embracing me where I am at this moment. Thank You for Your loving kindness that grabs a hold of me and comforts me when I’m in need. Thank You for being my Best Friend, and always being patient. I love You so much! I know You love me as well, but I ask today for a deeper insight on Your love for me! I thank You so much for this! Talk with You soon.
Love Your fearfully and wonderfully made daughter,